No Butts, No Boobs, No Bareness – Not at the Grammys! No Causes, either.

According to the Hollywood Reporter, a memo the Grammys sent to performers and/or their representatives on Wednesday, reminds them to cover up for the show Sunday night.

Among other things it says: Please be sure that buttocks and female breasts are adequately covered. Please avoid exposing bare fleshy under curves of the buttocks and buttock crack.

Buttock crack?!

CBS is broadcasting the Grammys and understandably they are sensitive to any exposed skin that might be problematic. You may remember that they were fined over $500,000 by the FCC for Janet Jackson’s infamous ‘wardrobe malfunction’ at the 2004 Super Bowl. That fine was eventually overturned, but I am guessing CBS is still nervous.

Exposing all or part of one’s body in public is not new at public events. It started with Lady Godiva.
Then there is ‘streaking’ – running naked at a public venue. It has occurred at a variety of sporting events and famously at the 1974 Academy Awards when a young man ran naked across the stage flashing the peace sign. David Niven, on stage at the time, said "Isn't it fascinating to think that probably the only laugh that man will ever get in his life is by stripping off and showing his shortcomings?" Believed at the time to be an ad lib, there is some evidence that the ‘streak’ was actually planned and the line had been prepared.

So, Beyonce, you can lip-sync, but make certain you keep all your flesh unexposed. Oh, and make certain that any cause you or any of your compatriots might be supporting is also not on display. “The Network requests that any organized cause visibly spelled out on talent’s wardrobe be avoided. This would include lapel pins or any other form of accessory.”

Here is the full text of the memo:

CBS Program Practices advises that all talent appearing on camera please adhere to Network policy concerning wardrobe.

Please be sure that buttocks and female breasts are adequately covered. Thong type costumes are problematic. Please avoid exposing bare fleshy under curves of the buttocks and buttock crack. Bare sides or under curvature of the breasts is also problematic. Please avoid sheer see-through clothing that could possibly expose female breast nipples. Please be sure the genital region is adequately covered so that there is no visible “puffy” bare skin exposure.

Please avoid commercial identification of actual brand name products on T-shirts. Foreign language on wardrobe will need to be cleared. OBSCENITY OR PARTIALLY SEEN OBSCENITY ON WARDROBE IS UNACCEPTABLE FOR BROADCAST. This as well, pertains to audience members that appear on camera.

Finally, The Network requests that any organized cause visibly spelled out on talent’s wardrobe be avoided. This would include lapel pins or any other form of accessory.


The Grammys are Sunday night 6pm Mountain Time, on CBS.